THIS IS BRILLIANT.
I wish I could retroactively add the six different doctors who refused any surgical intervention relating to my uterus and/or ovaries between the ages of 16 and 30 “in case you change your mind about having children.”
Excellent advice for all my readers who are having difficulty getting medical professionals to listen to them.
@thebibliosphere idk if you’ve tried this before or not but it’s worth a reblog
While this is an extremely good thing to know and use against horrible doctors, I will add in that you need to be prepared that it won’t work with all of them
I’ve had doctors straight up lean over their desk at me and say “and who do you think they’ll believe, you or me”, and had my files tarnished with words like “problem patient” and “refuses treatment”. This is not the majority of doctors, even the not-very-good ones are not that level of egotistical evil, but they do exist and you need to be prepared for what can happen if they decide to try and paint you as the madwoman in the attic.
Keep fighting, keep advocating for yourselves, find support groups, take notes in sessions, and don’t be afraid to get loud. And remember, you are allowed to have people with you in the doctor’s office for moral support. There is nothing stopping you from having someone in there who is willing to hold your hand and be a witness. And it is perfectly legal and any doctor that insists otherwise sets my alarm bells ringing.
(There are different scenarios, like hospital wards with restricted visiting times, surgery etc etc etc but even when the doctor has asked my person to leave, I have said “actually I’d like them to stay” and usually they just shrug and carry on with what they’re doing. Asking people to leave for exams is usually a comfort/privacy issue for you, and so long as you are okay with having that person there, that’s okay.)
Some doctors will ask to see you alone first to confirm that you want the person in the room with you, and that they are not say, the over controlling lover or someone trying to coerce you (which is good, and thank you to doctor’s and nurses who think to check to do this!), but once you say “I want this person in the room with me” they are allowed to be in the room.
My medical care changes drastically on whether or not my husband is in the room with me.
Also to the friends of chronically ill people: a lot of you ask me how you can be better friends to your sick friends, and lemme tell you, the offer to help with medical appointments alone can mean so much to us.
Whether it’s a casual “hey do you need a lift to see your X appointment?” or a more serious “wow that sounds stressful, you know if you ever want me to come with you I will right?” can really help us to feel less isolated and cope better with the stress of managing being ill. You’re not inserting yourself into our lives, you are offering to help us in a way we are often not helped, and it can really mean so much that you even think to ask.
Medical abuse thrives on silence. Break it.